Mum (reading School Report): What's this all about? Your teacher says he finds it impossible to teach you anything!
Child: I told you he was no good!

*  *  * 

Sister: Why are you standing in front of the mirror with your eyes closed?

Brother: To see what I look like when I'm asleep!

*  *  * 

Mum: Why are you putting sugars under your pillow?

Child: So that I'll have sweet dreams!

*  *  * 

Teacher: How can you prove that the world is round?

Pupil: I never said it was, miss.

*  *  * 

Dad: Do you want some help with your homework?

Child: No, thanks, Dad, I'll get it wrong on my own.

*  *  * 

Mum: Why are you putting that dish with the supper in the fridge?

Daughter: That it will not be cold.

*  *  * 

Father: My boy, I never kissed a girl until I met your mother. Will you be able to say the same thing to your son?

Son: Yes, but not with such a straight face.

*  *  * 

Mum: I've told you often enough those Smiths are bad boys for you to play with.

Son: But I'm a good boy for them to play with.