EIGHT THOUGHTS TO PONDER:

Number 8
Life is sexually transmitted

Number 7
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

Number 6
Men have two emotions :Hungry and Horny. They can't tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.
 

Number 5
Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe years.
 

Number 4
Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in
the hospitals, dying of nothing.

Number 3
All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

Number 2
In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

And The Number 1 Thought
Life is like a jar of Jalapeno peppers-- What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow

... and as someone recently said:

"Don't worry about old age--
It doesn't last that long